Thursday, September 11, 2008

ECONOMY FORCES E STREET BAND TO RELOCATE

Asbury Park, NJ. Foreclosures, spiraling debt and high gas prices have impacted one of the largest rock groups in the country. Citing rising rents and poor community relations, Bruce Springsteen's backing band, the E Street Band, has been forced to move. "What a bitch," stated guitarist Little Stevie Van Zandt as he carried a box of cooking utensils out of the group's home of 30 years. "We're looking into a new place, maybe over on Henderson Street, or Clarence (Clemens) thought he saw a place for rent out on Dunlow," stated drummer Max Weinberg. "It's a pisser though because we were finally starting to feel at home here," he continued. Rhythm guitarist Nils Lofgren was slightly more optimistic, "There's a couple of nice places on Galena Street, or if that doesn't work out I know a guy who's couch we can crash on over at Admiral and Nostler." Saxophone giant Clemens was decidedly less enthusiastic, "I got all this shit," he stated, motioning to a box of nick-nacks from his three decades of world travel, "where the fuck we gonna put that?" In the meantime, Springsteen with the newly christened Percival Way Condominium Street Band will begin a short tour of Canada and Nova Scotia in support of their latest album titled, "Fuck it."

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